I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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