the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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