so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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