There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
