Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
