i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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