Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
