everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Holy sore nipples Batman
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
