She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
so much tequila, so little girl.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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