It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
