Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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