I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
