Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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