it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
