Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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