we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I had to cum in my sink.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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