YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
