He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
