Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
