Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize