Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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