the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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