I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Randomize
