Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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