I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
