I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
This baby is an asshole
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
