I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
