He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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