even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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