Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
