You're my little dorito
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
