I molested 6 butterflies tonight
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Randomize
