He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
