told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
