she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
