I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
