Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
