I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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