fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
50% drunk capacity currently
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
