We won't sleep together?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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