what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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