Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
They have beer where we have blood.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
