everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
