"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
