birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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