Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
