NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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