Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
