So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
