dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize