Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
