I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
